How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Jim came home from work. only to find out his family had been murdered

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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What happened to the Jew with a boner that ran into a wall? He broke his nose.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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What's brown and sticky? Shit

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Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

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UNICORNZ R PURPUL

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

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Gays

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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FUCK THE CHRISTIANS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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