Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

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Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

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hi bye

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Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

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Whats that cool sound it makes when you thumbs a comment?

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

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what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

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How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

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womens rights

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period. Damnit, ignore that.

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from the black man

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

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why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

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Knock knock Who's there? A penguin A penguin who? Just kidding, a penguin could never survive in this climate, I'm mark and was wondering if I could give you an estimate on some new siding

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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why was the boy sad? because he was raped by a clown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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