what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

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Where do pimps go when they retire? Idaho.

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If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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AIDS

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What did the pedofile say to the little girl? Nothing. She was properly supervised by her parents.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down the hill. what black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a murder victim? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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roses are red violets are blue ur mom just died and u will 2

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Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

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What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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