Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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One time I masturbated by myself

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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