- Anti Joke

Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

What did the boy do when he got an F on his English paper? -Laughed.

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Shut the cork up!

Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

Q: wanna hear a racist joke? A: sure RB: You're pathetic!

What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.