A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

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How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

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Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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What do you call a fat kid who eats twinkies. Otto Hintz`````

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What do you call a black person with white legs ? Ashy

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

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Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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Wats rong with yo leg.....

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A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

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Guess what i just did. Master bait.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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