What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

"33"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

thumb_up thumb_down +21

fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops