Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

Bob fell off his roof.

Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

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What's worse than death? Nothing.

why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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