Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

thumb_up thumb_down -173

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +212

666

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What is 6 plus 9? 15.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the Kek Kick Ben? Cause Ben kicked Kek's Kik. KEKEKEK

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Surprise mother father (A+)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

thumb_up thumb_down -20

69

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Paige

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops