Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

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There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

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They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

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i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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