Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What does Kim Kardashian and a Navy Vessel have in common? They are both full of seamen!

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

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A mans opinion.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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What did one computer say to the other? 100111010100100111001010010001110101110010100010101011010011010010111000010101100100100100001101010000011111010010011010100110101001010100101010101010100101011010010010101010110010110010100100010101010101010

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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A retarded man walks into a bar and everyone was polite about his disability.

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Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

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Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

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Did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory? I don't remember how it goes... by the way, did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory?

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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Shut the cork up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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