How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The knocking didn’t cease. It grew harder as the voice grew louder. “Let me in! Let me in! LET ME IN!” The knocking grew so fierce it could have shattered the door. Tears leaked from her eyes. “What do I do,” she thought “should I open the door?” The knocking was more than she could bear. “I know you’re in there, Kat.” it said. Her stomach twisted, her breath caught in her throat, and tears now streamed down her face. “Go away!” she shouted finally. “Let me in!” it screamed in response. “Leave me alone!” she cried. The voice and the knocking echoed in her head, making her more nauseous than before. Reaching for the lock hesitantly, she sucked up her tears and held her breath, unlocking the door and throwing it open. Nothing was there. The tree stood in the yard unmoving, no wind. Nothing. She shut the door, shaking in fear. With the click of the lock, the room grew cold. Goose-bumps covered her skin. “Thank you for letting me in.” a voice whispered behind her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

... i forgot the joke :p

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

lybia

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Grammer is very important

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops