What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

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I can Nazi

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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Pinus Testicles

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

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Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

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knock knock piss off

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what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops