What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

What's the difference between you and yourself? Yourself has 4 more letter in it.

What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

have you seen Stevie Wonders house? Nope. oh well sorry for bothering you

Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

A midget walks under a bar

what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

Mike tyson

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? The bench can support a family.

3 women are eating popsicles, one is biting, one is licking, and one is sucking, which is married? The one with the wedding ring.

Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it’s all play.

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

Knock Knock! Come in!

Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

womens rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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