If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

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What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

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"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems show me your boobs

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Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

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Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

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wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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