What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Thumbs this down

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

brainfart

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the little boy put a bandaid on his knee. it doesn't really matter, he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two cows are in a field. One says to the other, "are you worried about this mad cow disease that's going around?" The other replies, "I'm not worried - I'm a squirrel."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a black man kills a family member of a mexican guy. the mexican guy goes to the police, what happens? The mexican guy gets deported back to his country after they realize that he was illegal

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops