Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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I share two rooms with my mother.

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Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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Take off your shoes.

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

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Whats an Anti-Joke? Funny

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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