What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly my dick down your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did he have to die so young? It just isn't fair... In all considerations, the bullet didn't ask to become embedded in his skull either.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I THINK I SEE BIGFOOT O is yo mom!! -____-

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

thumb_up thumb_down -20

As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What came first -- the chicken or the egg roll?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What do racists call a disgusting filthy monkey that savagely jumps around in the jungle and steals white chicks? A: The same as the rest, Donkey Kong.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is faster than a black man with a stereo? A car

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops