Why did the boy cry? Because he had a frog stapled to his face. Why did the boy cry harder? Because it queefed in the boys mouth.

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every 60 seconds in africa a minute passes

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In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

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What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

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Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

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--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

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what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops