How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

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Has anyone seen that clown that hides from gay people in Tesco's

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, nothing rhymes with purple.

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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What did the peanut say to the jelly

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

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A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Three men are travelling in a hot-air balloon, but it starts to go down over an uninhabitable desert. One of the men must sacrifice himself to save the other two by jumping overboard to reduce the weight in the balloon. Nobody is brave enough to volunteer, and they all die painful deaths.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

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this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

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roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

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Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

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69

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i dont like attention whores lol

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, and the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk.

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Get out of the way everybody, a group of elephants are tumbling down the mountain!

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Why did the black student fail his math test? Because he was severely traumatized by the school shooting that had occurred during the test. He was later relieved to hear that the teacher did not count the test, because the legal paperwork surrounding the death of 12 students was somewhat overwhelming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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