knock knock ... no one was in

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

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A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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learn the ropes?

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops