Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

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what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

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Ron Paul for President!

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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IMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM a beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee immmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooodfssgihsfdiug

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

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When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

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Why didn't the caterpillar turn into a butterfly? Because it was a cheeto

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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A Jewish man walked into a.............................................................................................................................................. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................car

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Nero the guy that killed four Neo Nazi`s desecrating the funeral of one of my late members in Chile with a revolver hidden in one of the 46 hidden pockets on the inside of his trench jacket with lots of folders here, inside whose only side effect is making me look like I spend a lot more time at the gym, later one of them found me, ran towards the police which laughed at him pointed at me and said: That guy with a prosthetic arm? You dont believe me... Excellent! Nero The Avenger

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Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

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Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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