What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

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how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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what did the apathetic person say? Who Cares?

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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Why did the man die? He got shot!

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

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Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

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Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

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What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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