From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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69

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A moose walks into a grocery store. It goes up to the clerk and asks, "do you guys have any potatoes?" the clerk replies oh yeah they're in isle... Ooooh wait a second. You're a moose. The moose responds, "Yes, indeed I am." The clerk then says "Oh ok, isle seven."

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

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What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

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A dolphin walks into a bar. Dolphins do not have legs therefore this is physically impossible.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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How are a pizza and a jew similar? They both are people aside from the pizza.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

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Scott Gomez

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Netflix and chill

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Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

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yo mama's so fat, she wears a big belt

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s e m e n

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why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

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Ju... Just why?

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what did God say when He saw a black man? Oops I urnt one.

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A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops