Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Gary Busey walk into a bar. Everyone Ran out noticing the potential danger.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

thumb_up thumb_down +50

3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops