What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was being deporting because he over stayed his visa and is now an illegal immigrant

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why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

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How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

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boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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You are Nerochan right?

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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Mitt Romney penis

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Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

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Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

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what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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Why did the lonely man stop talking? He was alone.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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