Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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lol a man is drowning

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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Patriarchy.

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Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins the china town

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How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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Lets go Yankees

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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Someone made a Titanic joke to me today, It was just plane wrong.

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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What did the dead person say? Nothing, dead people cant talk, coz they are dead

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-What's the worst part about killing a baby? -Probably either recieving the death sentence or living psychologically scarred in prison for life.

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your mum

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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