What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

OBAMA and the DEMOCRATS

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats 10-5(45+76)? please help my homework is due next class and i am currently to busy worrying about my dad's cancer to think about this problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A homosexual walks into a church

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where do pimps go when they retire? Idaho.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's funnier than a comedic movie? Genocide

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

hey guys what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

thumb_up thumb_down +13

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops