what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

thumb_up thumb_down +17

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the apathetic person say? Who Cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The BCS

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops