Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

A midget walks under a bar

what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

Three monkeys are sitting in a tree. Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? -He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -Peer pressure.

Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

womens rights

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

Q: whats up? A: radiation levels in japan

How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

I share two rooms with my mother.

Neither does he.

what's the difference between a black man and a lift? both can raise babies, a part from the black man

Your Mom.

Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...