Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

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What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

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What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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This is not an anti joke.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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these are shit

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What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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