A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A car enters a curve. An ice-cream man pops out from a manhole and throws a pine cone to the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

thumb_up thumb_down -11

you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do you get a blonde out of a tree? you politely ask her, then if all else fails call the local fire department

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's harder nailing 10 babies to 1 tree... Or nailing 1 baby to 10 trees???

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I hate long jokes -_-

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than getting AIDS? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:What did the Black man say to New York? A: Black Out.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops