How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

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why are black people good at basketball cuz their tall

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elen degeneres is straight....

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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What is worse than reading an anti-joke relatively similar to the other? Walking in your front yard and realizing a zombie is eating your dead grandmother.

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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Why did the gay man die? He had AIDS

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

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knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

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What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

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my whole life!

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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