whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

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On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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What do you get if you take the head off a Koala and a Wombat and swap them around? A bloody mess and about 4 years in jail.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? An Xbox 360.

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"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

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Why did Miley Cyrus have to buy a new tour bus? The old one stopped twerking.

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Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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A black guy gets a job...

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Charlotte Bobcats

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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Why did the boy cry? Because he had a frog stapled to his face. Why did the boy cry harder? Because it queefed in the boys mouth.

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Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

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Chrissy is funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops