ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

There was a screwdriver and a spoon. What did the screwdriver say to the spoon? Nothing because neither of them are living objects and it is impossible for inanimate objects to talk.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

How do you get a black man out of KFC? Tell him to get out

How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

Yo momma so ugly she looks like a penis

what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

Your momma's so stupid that as a child she was often afraid to show her report card to her parents, for fear of their disapproval.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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