What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

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When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

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Needless to say,

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Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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Men, get on the boat.

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

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What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

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once upon a time there was a boy

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

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Membean

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IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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What do you call a guy with no hands working in a hat store? larry

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

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What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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