What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the elephants get in a taxi? They were going to the airport.

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What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

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Another cat joke. You gotta be kitten me.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -A kazoo. -A kazoo who? -A small, simple musical instrument consisting of a hollow pipe with a hole in it, over which is a thin covering that vibrates and produces a buzzing sound when the player sings or hums into the pipe.

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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toast points

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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