Why did Pamela Anderson cross the road? To meet me.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call a man with no legs? An ambulance as he seem to be bleeding very heavily.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call 55,000 clowns exiting a small car? Fiction.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats the worst part of Chemotharapy? The Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Trolololollolololololololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well, he graduated in 4 years with a degree in chemical engineering due to his diligence and good work ethic. He now has a well paying job that allows him to support his wife and two kids and to pay the mortgage on their large home.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

AJ enjoyed his trip to Pen Island

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's dumber than a black guy that can't read? Two black guys that can't run with TVs.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? 2 Survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the man say when he saw a purple cow? Nothing. He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats brown and sticky? a four week dead uunborn african child...

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops