Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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