Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

The Barackness Monster

A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

What's funnier than 24? 25

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

"I see," said the blind man to the deaf man.

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

what's 9+10? 19, not 21

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

Women.

A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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