when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

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How did Princess Diana cross the road? Through the windshield

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What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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