four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs. A pharmisict.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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i like turtals and kids

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how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

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Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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do you know that joke? hmm no.. yaa life!

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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- I'm in my mum's car, broom broom. - Get out me car. - Aw.

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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