There's a black guy and a white guy standing in a bar, surprisingly the black guy doesn't die. This isn't a racist joke.

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knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

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What's worse than accidentally biting your tongue? Hitler accidentally biting your tongue.

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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what is worse than finding a dead worm in an apple? Obama being elected a second time

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

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Whats better than an anti joke? Having sex with a supermodle

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Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

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Canada AYY

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

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why was the 40 year old still a virgin? it doesnt know either.

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"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

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Why did the n i g g e r steal money? because he was black! and wanted a KFC thanksgiving! :)

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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