- Anti Joke

a man walked into a bar ouch

What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

They say those with anti-humour are the wisest.

A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

Needless to say,

Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

Men, get on the boat.

roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

once upon a time there was a boy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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