What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

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If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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matty russel are you on here

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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brandon ya twwat

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing duplicates of the top jokes.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

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A guy says a joke. It was not funny

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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Woman's rights.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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