How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

Why did the kitchen cross the road?

How do you get your children out of a cardboard box? You open the box to see your dead children's corpses

A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

falling didnt make the difference

Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

An elephant walks in to a dry cleaners and asks the Chinese man behind the counter for the price of cleaning two shirts. The man replies, "$3.00."

Your mom is so hairy that she must not feel comfortable in her everyday life.

Q: Why did Katie fall of the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Katie

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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