- Anti Joke

What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

You have cancer

what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

YOLO.

A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

Do you want to French kiss? What are you, racist

A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

Your mums a penis joke.

Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

i saw your mom, i said hi

what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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