What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

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What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

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An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

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A guy trips a blind man.

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops