Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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What is the square-root of pi? ?pi

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Do you know mirror has 6 letters and half of then are r's?

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Do you believe this will change?

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Why did the boy go to the CONCENTRATION camp. He was a Jew

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

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I Have a Black Friend

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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knock knock who's there?

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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YOLO.

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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You have cancer

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What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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