its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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what's the fastest way to have someone murder you tell your wife you are cheating on her

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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Well educated black man.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

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Your Momma's so ugly, she went to the grocery store, and went she got out of her car, people said, "You're ugly."

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A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The answer really isn't that important.

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Whats plastic and little boys turn it on? A game cube, and Michael Jackson. Well maybe not anymore since hes dead...

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What's funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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Hey guya im a female stripper and if you want to have some fun call me 8633972535 thanks. -Tyler

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

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What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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