#Hanging Degus

What is the most dangerous day of the week to leave the house? Garbage day. Moral: Or rather GAAAAAAAAAARBAAAAAGE DAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *BANG BANG BANG* >:D

Knock knock. Who is it? The police officer. ok, im not home.

What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

What's green,has 4 legs and lives in a tree? A pool table

What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

Homosexuals are gay.

How can you spot a blind person at a nudist colony? They might be carrying a white stick, or have a guide dog or someone to help them navigate the premises.

What's fourteen inches long and purple and can make a woman scream all night? crib death

whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

my name is Jacob sartorious

What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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